We buried mom yesterday

It's kind of like eating sweet & sour pork. It was sad to see her go but joyful to know she's with her Father in Heaven. As much as I wanted to be in control of my emotions, they won and so it was a rollercoaster ride all day. I was exhausted. Dad must truly be tired. We've worked hard to make sure he is getting rest but all the people at the house yesterday kept his adrenaline pumping. He'll crash very soon and it'll be good for him. Dana and I reflected on the whole process of funerals, burying, etc. and both feel like there has to be a better way. Strictly looking at it from Dad's perspective, he had been at mom's side day and night for weeks. The emotional rollercoaster he was on had to be incredible. Then after all that, spend many hours at a funeral home entertaining guests. I know it was great to see old friends but he was so tired. I don't know what the better way is yet but I started asking questions about why we do some of the things we do at funerals and cemeteries. I'll have to get back to this. Any thoughts?

"Everybody's Shot"

There's a scene in "Black Hawk Down" that contains some dialogue that really has a much deeper application. In the scene, the U.S. Army Ranger colonel is in charge of a small convoy of humvees trying to make its way back to base under heavy gun and rocket fire. The colonel stops the convoy, takes in some wounded, tears a dead driver out of a driver's seat, and barks at a bleeding sergeant who's standing in shock nearby:

Colonel: Get into that truck and drive.
Sergeant: But I'm shot, Colonel.
Colonel: Everybody's shot, get in and drive.

"Everybody's shot."

I think all of us are high maintenance these days. We all have "needs." We all have "unmet expectations." The problem I see is that we are very sensitive but not towards each other. Why? I think it's selfishness. I certainly experience it. I want things my way. This is sin. No matter which way you look at it, it is sin.
It seems like so many people have a chip on their shoulder and are daring anyone to knock it off. People want to be a "victim." Are they in that much need of attention that they'll allow themselves to be that absorbed in their own life that they will ignore the needs of others? I'll admit that I have. Consider what Paul predicts in 2 Tim 3: 1-5...
¹But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. ²People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, ³without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, ⁴treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— ⁵having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them.

Ouch

The lesson that I've learned is that God has commanded us to esteem others higher than ourselves. Jesus wants us to "other-oriented." So, check your baggage at the door. Look at others first and meet their needs.

Everybody's shot. Get over it and focus on someone else.
Or to put it another way. "You're unique. Just like everybody else"

"All work and no play makes Dad a dull boy."

At least that's what my oldest son told me the other day. I think it's amusing to listen to the perspectives of a younger generation. He told me the other day that he doesn't envy me and said I do nothing but work. That it must be a drudgery for me. He said I should play more. That I don't have any fun.

Without life experiences, it's hard to comprehend older people. I find it hard to understand people older than myself, but to have a conversation with my son about how I should live my life was interesting. My son will soon be 20 years old. He basically has a life without responsibility. Sure, he has a couple of jobs and a class at a community college but in comparison, his life is free. So to hear him give me "sage" advice about what I should value was interesting. And from his view of the world, he's right.

Ok, I'll admit, he's right to a degree. Having too much house and too much yard takes away from your family. Sure, you're at home but your constantly working on something. I could have had a smaller house or lived in a neighborhood where I didn't have to do so much work. But I think on a larger perspective a son is never going to comprehend what a father can find enjoyable or relaxing or satisfying.

• There is satisfaction knowing that your children are living a life without wondering if they will eat tonight.
• There is joy when you drive up and your little kids open the car door to give you a big hug and a kiss. What's that worth?
• There is joy when your teenage daughter asks you if she can talk and ask for some advice. How much would you pay for that?
• Is there any satisfaction knowing that your kids want you to play with them? Even when they're 16? You betcha.

My son hasn't experience what it's like to have a wife, a lover and best friend. I don't blame him for having these ideas about me. It's just interesting that his perspective about my life is the way it is.

1 Cor. 13:11 says: When I was a little child I talked and felt and thought like a little child. Now that I am a man my childish speech and feeling and thought have no further significance for me.

So I wonder...What I am not seeing that my heavenly father is seeing? What is satisfying to Him? What brings him joy? Many times I think that I have been given the wonderful privilege of being the father of six children in order to get a glimpse of what He sees, feels and desires. It brings me satisfaction to have my children truly desire me and want to be around me and talk to me. It breaks my heart to see them disobey and avoid me. My heart is troubled until I know they are safe, etc.

While I will not stop being the father I think they need, I'll take my son's advice and loosen up a bit.

Note: I've not fully thought this out but would be curious if any of you have any thoughts.

I was just minding my own business when God appeared.

You never know when God is going to grab you, shake you, get your attention to tell you something. I was looking at some Christian T shirts on-line when I saw one that grabbed my attention. I began to read it. It had a scripture on it. Jeremiah 29: 11-13. It goes like this:

¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Verse 12 had a profound impact on me. I literally stopped and cried. We all know that God is the creator of everything and sort of yawn at that statement. I really needed a friend this morning and I just became overwhelmed that my God says, "talk to me and I will listen." How many times have I heard that and took it for granted?

For various reasons, I have drifted from my relationship with him and when I was least expecting, he reaches out to me. Just like a father would do. I am so thankful he can love a sinner like me!

Hard lesson to learn on the baseball field

Sometimes life is not fair. I tell that to my kids but today, I had a dose of my own medicine. I love baseball. Always have. Since the age of six, I have played on baseball teams. Some good and some terrible. Today, my company, Cox Communications played in a co-ed, double-elimination tournament. We have really good players so it makes it difficult for the coach to get everyone involved on the team. Unfortunately, I did not see much playing time. In fact, out of three games I played only two innings and those were in game that was over in the second. Oh well, I had fun warming up. So life doesn't always go the way you want it to. What do you do? Forget about it or will eat at you. I write about it so others can do the same. Fairness is the enemy of right. If we try to be fair all the time, doing what's right may get dropped. Our society demands fairness and, in-turn, we get worse and worse. We teach to the lowest common denominator, we hire based on quotas and skin color and reward only if everyone gets something.

So, I didn't see the kind of playing time I wanted. Fair? No. Right? Probably. I can't hit left-handed, which is what all the men had to do... just to make it fair. ;)

Close the Zoo!

I can't wait for the week between Christmas and New Years. We leave for a quiet vacation. The Zoo will be closed! Dana and I were introduced to this concept when we taught Growing kids God's way. Periodically, Zoos will close to give the animals a break from the people. They can go about their day without having someone always looking at or talking to them. The animals eat better, are less agitated and tend to be more friendly with each other. Then, when the gates open again, the animals are happy again.



So, are we much different? Every night, we are on the go and during the day, it's very busy with the normal frantic rush. SO when we close the zoo, we're going away and will hopefully eat well, exercise, relax, sleep become more friendly with each other

Fireproof your marriage

The movie Fireproof is in theaters. It's really good. They zero in on the issues that break up marriages. For the man, it's collecting stuff and satisfying lustful desires and for women it's dealing with submission. There's much more but it's worth seeing. It won't be in theaters long. These movies seldom last that long. Don't miss it! It could save your marriage!